Back to Basics

When we feel bad physically we go to the doctor for a checkup. When our recovery is a little lax is good to do a check up from the neck up. Going back to the basics is what has worked for me in jump starting a relaxed recovery. Sometimes I feel blue. Sometimes I feel disconnected from my program and sometimes I feel that I’ve spiritually lost my connection. I’ve learned there are tools I have that assist me in getting back on course. Getting back to the basics is what keeps me in sobriety, one day at a time. If I feel blue I turn to my gratitude list and remember the ten most important things for me. When I feel disconnected from my program I get on the phone and make as many calls as I can in order to speak to three people. It has been suggested in the “Tools of Recovery” text to make at least 3 calls a day. I highly recommend this. The good conversations can really get you out of your head and stop those disconnected feelings. And when I’m feeling a little out of sorts spiritually, I spark up a good conversation with my higher power. One of the best things I know is He’s always there to listen. Afterwards I feel His guidance, love and light. A very fulfilling experience and one that makes me smile. Now I know you might say, “That’s great, it works for you.” Well, these basics tools do work for me. That’s why I suggest them to all my sponsees when they are feeling out of sorts with their program. Who knows it could work for you. Give it a try and I meet you in sobriety. TyF.

Willingness And Desire

Willingness and Desire, it sounds like a good name for a romance novel. Truth be told it’s the two most important qualities as addicts we can have in order to seek sobriety, one day at a time. I remember when I first came to the rooms, I didn’t have the willingness nor the desire for sobriety. I felt that I didn’t have any problems. I guess if I could have listened to my shares from those early days they probably didn’t have much substance to them. Then a funny thing happened, I actually admitted I was a sex addict years later and ended up coming back to the rooms out of desperation. Desperation to stop the pain I was in. The second time around I had realized I actually had a problem and it was effecting my life. Thank GOD! I finally had the willingness needed to seach for the solution. I even had the desire to stop acting out. This is all thats needed in order to stop the insanity, willingness and desire. For me, I applaud those who keep coming back to the rooms and haven’t put together long sobriety. I understand their plight, just as they understand mine. They keep coming back because they have a desire to stop acting out and a willingness to show up to meetings. The “crutial two.” Even with my three and a half years these two words are paramount in my struggle to stay sober, one day at a time and I applaud anyone who finds their way to these rooms with their own willingness and desire. God bless you all. TyF

When Our Character Defects Get In The Way

Life would always be a bowl of cherrys if it wasn’t for our character defects getting in the way. Sounds boring right. Not really. I for one would love to live in a perfect world, then reality sets in and these darn things called defects of character knawl at me like a dog on a bone. It wouldn’t be that bad except for the fact that I’ve tried to ignor the outfall of my behaviour.Then there was the guilt. Oh my God it seemed as though I had slayed someone with the amount of guilt I was carrying around with me. Wouldn’t you know it another character defect shows up because I’m trying to look good. PRIDE, what a terrible defect. Well the whole mess could have been avoided if I just did the next right thing and was honest. But no, my addict was rearing it’s ugly little head by this time and I just sat there afraid of my own shadow. Thank God for sponsors. Mine of course was quick to point out all of my defects after I told him what happened, with gloves of love. He reminded me why I was in program and what program meant. He says the right thing so it seems, at always the right moment just enough to get me to realize the truth of my behaviors. I love him for that. So we have a good laugh. I stop beating myself up and I remember why program works. The best is that I can move forward having learned a new lesson and know that being honest is always better than lying and that PRIDE always makes you look worse not better.

Commitments…A Way Of Life

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One word in the english vocabulary that tends to shy people away is the word commitment. While I must say I shunned it most of my adult life, I finally learned to embrace it when I got into recovery. There’s something about it that really got under my skin after I started in the rooms. I guess because it really means so much in a positive manner. I’ve become committed to my higher power, to my recovery, to my marriage, to my sponsees, and to my friends. I gained a whole new perspective on what used to scare me to death. Oh I was committed to my addiction all right, but not nearly as committed as I am to my recovery. Being committed to my recovery allows me to reap rewards of the mind and soul. A commitment to my addiction just got me more chaos. The trade off is not equal whatsoever. Today I choose to be a man of honorable commitments and have watched my life soar with miracles. Thank you Papa.