Keep Coming Back

Today is a new day. The sun rose. The winds of freedom were blowing and I was once again writing on Recovery Monologue. The quote “Keep coming back” is the message I feel closest to today. Even though the original blog was dismantled and blown across cyberspace into a million pieces. I just said, “Okay we can rebuild this and with safeguards that weren’t in place in it’s first life. People kept supporting me to “Keep moving forward. Fight for it. Just keep the flame alive.” So with all the support from everyone, we are back. And we’ll keep coming back just like I do with my recovery. If God was done with me and didn’t want me to breathe a second life into RM, then I would never had found GoDaddy.com or this blog. But I kept my faith in my Higher Power and waited patiently for the answers to come and here we are. A blessing to be sure.

Like one sister in group always says, “Keep coming back.” I love her for that steadfastness she has to program. She empowers me everytime she spells it out for all of us to hear. God I love her. Thank you. So for me I’ll keep coming back to get empowered by all the incredible love and support I get from my program, the group and fellowship. Thank you all for the support you have given to Recovery Monologue and please KEEP COMING BACK so we can once again be a light to those still in the darkness of addiction and give hope that the miracle still exists for those who seek it…God bless you all on your journeys.

13 thoughts on “Keep Coming Back

  1. Keep Coming Back… my favorite phrase of the 12 step programs. To be honest when I got to the rooms it was the ONLY thing I could do. I could not admit powerlessness, my life wasn’t insane it was fun. Take it Easy, forget about it if I did have a crisis I couldn’t perpetuate my acting out. First Things First no way I had to get all the way to the end result with out doing all the steps in front of it… small problem with immediate gratification. But by the Grace of God…. kinda needed a higher power to do that one, so couldn’t do that one in the beginning either. Feelings aren’t facts, try getting a newcomer to believe that one. Live and Let Live um yeah that one was tough too and how about Time Takes Time…. nope didn’t get that one either.

    However, One Day at a Time and Keep Coming are the rods in my spine today to keep me Trudging this Road to a Happy Destiny…. don’t know about the destination but for the first time in my life I am enjoying the journey because I kept coming back.

  2. Awesome – Great to see the website back – and it looks new and improved. Recovery Monologue got me through some really difficult times and has been a key part to my progress in this program. I don’t use it as much as I should, and that is my own fault. I am glad that it is back and look forward to the continued support and help that it has given me in the past.

    • Keep coming back. I am now sober just 3 days, but it’s a new beginning. What works for me now is bringing the body to the meetings, meetings and more meetings.
      Getting outside of my addictive mind and isolation and connecting with my higher power and real members and people is the key.
      If Addiction is Fantasy and living in isolation, Recovery is Reality and making real connections with God and people around me.

  3. Congratulations, LJ, on putting this site back together! I know I missed it very much – such a wonderful forum to “let my thoughts out to dry!”

    I don’t go to meetings and this is very important to me as a place to share thoughts, feelings, challenges and successes with my brothers and sisters. We need to be completely open with people we trust to make sure we are still on the path to healing, and it’s wonderful that we get to do that again. Welcome back everyone, great to see you (and hear you) again!

  4. Although I don’t come back all the time. I keep coming back all the time. If that makes sense. I keep coming back to the meetings, the website (Thank God and LJ it’s back), my sponsor, sponsee’s, and my program which has kept me sober and happy all these months and years.. Keep up the great work LJ and everyone who posts. God Bless and KEEP COMING BACK!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I will!! :)

  5. Welcome Back!
    The second day after ‘discovery’, I came back into the rooms and someone came over and said “welcome back”. They recognized me, asked how I was feeling and made me feel at home. That person was LJ.
    Today, I know that G-d works his miracles through others and RM is one of the miracles of recovery.
    Thank you again my friend, may G-d bless you and all those that find healing through this website.

  6. I am glad to see the site back too. I kept trying to come when It was shut down and I couldn’t, which worried me because I know how much of an asset this is. I am relieved and happy it is back. Thanks LJ, you are such a blessing to me and to SAA recovery.

  7. For me, recovery is the act of making all the confusion and pain recede without acting out. For me, this act can be found anywhere I go in real life or in my head. It can be found and only found if I am willing to find it. That for me is where the biggest struggles and the greatest rewards lie. I often need to tell myself that I am willing. Thanks for coming back.

  8. I am grateful to my Higher Power for using LJ to join us again on this forum. Recovery can be a challenge and every day I know it is my choice to work the program. We have many recovery tools available to us, but this website is a key one for me. Even if I don’t have time to post, I can read the topics and discussions to gain from the experiece, strength and hope of my recovery family. Thank you to each person who shares – there is a common theme in all of our journeys. I am blessed by hearing the honesty, the pain and the encouragement Higher Power provides as we choose to walk in faith and recovery each day. Peace to each of us!

  9. The Little Things

    It’s easy for me to say how well I’m doing in recovery. I haven’t acted out in 2 1/2 years, haven’t flirted or started any secret little inappropriate relationships, and am much more open and honest—except perhaps in the “little things”. Maybe I don’t face things head on because it might cause an argument – or maybe I will procrastinate doing my steps, or put off hard conversations – using “avoidance” to keep part of me secret. Maybe not being as authentic, or open, about how I think or what I do. It’s called “taking the easy way out”. These are all signs that there is still fear and guilt and shame in me, and that I am still covering up (even in small ways} who I am really. I think recovery really begins to bloom when I can let people know the REAL me, and not worry whether or not they approve or disapprove. It is when I KNOW that I am a good person, an honest person, and that I can be trusted, that the me I am becoming, is good enough, that there is nothing to hide and nothing to fear. If we clean up OUR side of the street, we are not responsible for how the other side reacts. Although I have certainly made progress, I look forward to being confident, happy and approving of who I am becoming. It’s still progress, not perfection that is the realistic goal.

  10. The pride and ego of my shame always kept me from coming back. Carrying a desperate need to appear “ok” to others, despite the hell that was going on inside of me, coupled with a good dose of perfectionism, I would avoid the rooms after a slip or full scale relapse. I didn’t want anyone to see that I was imperfect, that I was not doing so well as I put on or as I sounded, that I wasn’t a recovery “guru”.
    So, instead of running back to meetings for help and support, I either gave up going to meetings or decided they just really didn’t work for me. Either way, it always led to a full-on relapse and, sooner or later, “pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization” as the AA Big Book puts it. As my sponsor always reminds me…”sexual addiction never gets better, it always gets worse.”
    When I was in the year-and-a-half long grip of the worst relapse of my life, all I could think to do when I hit another terrible bottom was to go to a meeting and keep going to meetings. I knew the meetings were the only place I was going to find whatever answer there may be to my sexual addiction. I certainly lost all hope of finding the answer sitting at home looking at porn into the early morning hours, in sex clubs, or in the back rooms of adult bookstores.
    I used to literally hate saying, “Keep coming back, it works if you work it” at the end of meetings. Today, I say it with a smile on face, joy in my heart and the firm conviction that for sex addicts like me it is a hard, yet comforting reality. I cannot, nor will I work this beautiful, life-giving program of recovery if I don’t keep coming back to the meetings and the love, support and help of my fellow brother and sister sex addicts I find there.

  11. One of the first maxims I heard was “Keep Coming Back”. When I walked into my first meeting I did not know what to expect and adopted a wait and see attitude. By the time that first meeting was over I had found hope and had no doubt I would come back. I just didn’t know now often.
    The morning after my first meeting I had an introductory session with a sex addiction therapist. The session went well, and I felt I could work well with him. At the end of our time together he asked me if I knew about SAA. I told him I attended my first meeting the night before. He strongly suggested that I do whatever it takes to make ninety meetings in ninety days. Since I wasn’t working at the time I had no good reason not to try it. Besides, it gave me something to look forward to on lonely evenings, and I was desperate for relief.
    I couldn’t find a meeting on Sunday so I substituted sharing on Recovery Monologue. In this way I attended ninety meetings in about 96 days. With exercise, prayer and meditation each morning, reading recovery literature and working my steps part of each day, I was able to keep my days full when I wasn’t looking for work. Early in this process it occurred to me that I had completely bought into the twelve-step program. The shame and guilt were subsiding. I was a calmer person, more accepting of my faults and others. And, I was discovering my spiritual center. I found that I was becoming one of those members who would say to newcomers, “Keep Coming Back”.
    I now attend two meetings a week. Sometimes I am tired and would rather stay home. I keep coming back because it is always an enlightening experience for me. I am sincerely grateful for all my brothers and sisters who attend these meetings, for sharing their strength, hope and experience, for their courage and honesty, and for their unconditional love and support.

  12. I indulged in a lot of Middle circle behavior yesterday. yet Despite all this I could find the willingness to reach out to GOD and others in the program, who guided me and helped me to do the next right thing.
    MY ADDICT wants to to live in constant shame, so I cant reach out for help, but little by little I am able to let go, let GOD in and seek and follow direction.

    I have so much gratitude now to everyone who is helping me because I know I cant do it on my own.
    I just need to KEEP COMING BACK and trudge the road to happy destiny where others before me have gone.

    Thank you GOD and thank you SAA and the fellowship

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