Step four was a very taxing step for me to go through. What I was being asked to do as not an easy job by any stretch of the imagination. I was told to make a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself. Wow! I said you want me to do what? Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself. Oh, you mean be honest about everything I’ve done that was underhanded, anger related, or fear based in my life and making a list. Well I was hard pressed to want to be that honest, but I knew I had to be rigorously honest for program to work. I tell you it takes courage to be that honest. I wasn’t scared to do this step, I was shameful of most of my activities that I did and regretted. My sponsor put it best when he told me to pray to God and ask for the willingness to do this step. I saw the light. It was about the willingness, to have the courage, to dig that deep into my past, to pull out the events that shaped my current condition. As I knew from the first three steps I had to be willing to go to any length to get my sobriety. This was just a continuation of the first three steps. Building blocks for the rest of my life. I declared myself worthy of the task and dived head first into the pool of reflections. I can say after doing my fifth step that the forth step gave me a sense of healing that I had never known before and am so grateful to have done. Sure it took time; it took looking deep inside myself to pull out the “stuff” I was made up of. What a sense of wellness when I was through. God bless you all who do your forth step, a rigorously honest forth step cause you’re worth it.